Hope

Today is Day 10 since I first began showing signs of COVID. In those ten days I have run the gamut of symptoms typically associated with the virus and still I'm not recovered. I had fully expected to be back at work by now, but after yesterday, where I was so exhausted I spent most of the day in bed, and still not being able to eat without gastro symptoms, I made the call to have at least another day or so at home. 

Usually, I would enjoy additional time at home but I am so over being sick and not being able to do anything. Yesterday I read a teen book that I probably haven't read since I was, well, in my teens (or at least twenties). I then looked at virtually every book in my collection, and not one appealed to me. Not one. 

Nor does reading an eBook. Or doing anything really. As I said, I am so over being sick.

In despair this morning, I was reminded of a devotional I read a few days ago. I opened up Spurgeon's Faith's Checkbook for March 25, and this is what I read ...

" 'When thou liest down, thou shalt not be afraid; yea, thou shalt lie down, and thy sleep shall be sweet' Prov. 3:24. 

IS the reader likely to be confined for a while to the bed by sickness? let him go upstairs without distress with this promise upon his heart - "When thou liest down, thou shalt not be afraid." ... If with our laying down there is a laying down of all cares and ambitions, we shall get refreshment out of our beds such as the anxious and covetous never find in theirs. ... To have sweet sleep we must have sweet lives, sweet tempers, sweet mediations, and sweet love."

Spurgeon was no stranger to illness and despair. This was not simply an intellectual exercise. He knew intimately the cares and woes and concerns of ill health - experienced it both in his own body and in the long-term ill-health of his beloved wife. 

And then this morning I opened the devotional again to read these words ...

" 'Be careful for nothing; but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known unto God. And the peace of God, which passeth all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus' Phil. 4:6,7

NO care, but all prayer. No anxiety, but much joyful communion with God. Carry your desires to the Lord of your life, the guardian of your soul. Go to Him with two portions of prayer, and one of fragrant praise. Do not pray doubtfully, but thankfully. Consider that you have your petitions, and therefore thank God for His grace. ... Hide nothing. ...Run not to man. Go only to your God, the Father of Jesus, who loves you in Him.

This shall bring you God's own peace, you shall not be able to understand the peace which you shall enjoy. It shall enfold you in its infinite embrace. ...

Yes, Lord, I do believe thee; but I beseech thee, help mine unbelief."

God Has Done It

 

This past week we experienced an amazing answer to prayer. I still have tears in my eyes when I think of all that God has done. Even when it seemed nothing was happening, we know now that He was at work. Throughout the past few months as we have prayed and others have joined us in praying, the journey has often been one of ups and downs, disappointment and pain. Hope often seemed fleeting.

While I proclaimed with my mouth - and my pen - that God could do it, there were still times I doubted. It seemed so impossible - especially given the time frame - and I had to remind myself again and again that the God who created all things, could do this.

And now our prayers have been answered. When I received the news I knew how David must have felt when he danced until the Lord. I wanted to dance. 

And cry. 

And laugh. 

And shout it from the rooftops.

God is faithful. He is good. He has done this. Oh praise His Name!

Hear my cry, O God;

Attend to my prayer.

From the end of the earth I will cry to You;

When my heart is overwhelmed;

Lead me to the rock that is higher than I.

For You have been a shelter for me,

A strong tower from the enemy.

I will abide in Your tabernacle forever;

I will trust in the shelter of Your wings. Selah.

Psalm 61:1-4, NKJV

Then our mouth was filled with laughter,

And our tongue with singing.

Then they said among the nations,

"The Lord has done great things for them."

The Lord has done great things for us,

And we are glad.

Psalm 126:2-3, NKJV

3 

Moving Mountains

Whenever I look at creation I can only marvel at our awesome God. His is the power and the glory. He alone is God. There is none other. 

Earlier today we received the news that DIL#5 has been denied permission to enter New Zealand. This is a huge disappointment and not what we had been praying for and, yet, given what we know of such applications, it's not totally unexpected. 

There doesn't always appear to be a lot of humanity in the making of these decisions. We do not know why it was deemed that DIL#5 did not meet the criteria, but we believe that marriage is ordained by God. For that reason we are trusting that He will make a way for this young couple. 

I am not a "glass half-full" kind of person nor do I feel that I have the gift of faith, but I firmly believe that God can and will overcome the obstacles that are in their path. In fact, these obstacles are nothing to a God who can part the sea and raise the dead. His Word tells us that if we have faith we can move mountains. 

And so we have faith that these obstacles will be overcome. That this door that has been closed - and locked and bolted - will be thrown wide open and DIL#5 will be able to enter this country and be with her new husband. 

Spending every available minute working on their wedding quilt is an act of faith that it will be sooner rather than later when they will be reunited. I often pray over the wedding quilts as I make them, and this one will certainly have a lot of prayer stitched into it. I have made the promise that with God's help I will endeavor to pray for them every single day until DIL#5 once again sets foot in Aotearoa. (Of course I'll pray for them afterwards as well, but this is specifically about a successful application to come to New Zealand.) 

So Jesus answered and said to them, "Have faith in God. For assuredly, I say to you, whoever says to this mountain, 'Be removed and be cast into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart, but believes that those things he says will be done, he will have whatever he says. Therefore I say to you, whatever things you ask when you pray, believe that you receive them, and you will have them." Mark 11: 22-24, NKJV

For with God nothing will be impossible. Luke 1:37, NKJV

The Ugly Side

 

If there is one thing I have learnt about isolation in the past six or so weeks is that it has its ugly side.

Mid-March New Zealand went into a strict COVID-19 Level 4 lockdown, the likes of which are rarely seen in democratic nations. Except for essential workers, citizens were confined to their homes, allowed only to move to purchase groceries or gain some fresh air within their immediate neighbourhood. And I mean immediate. On one of my seldom forays into a neighbouring street I observed someone running energetically back and forth between two driveways.

When one did chance to meet another human being, we gave each other a wide berth, avoided eye contact, and didn't even mumble a half-hearted hello. Even for an introvert like myself, this was difficult to stomach. On the days that DH had to work, I longed for some human interaction - even just someone waving from the opposite side of the street. But it was not to be.

Our government's rhetoric originally was to "flatten the curve" in order to allow our health system to cope with the numerous cases of COVID-19. That has happened, but now the goal has changed - without the consent of the voting public - to "eliminate" the virus. Whether that's even possible I don't know. If it does occur, then millions of New Zealanders will be particularly vulneranle when the borders are reopened and we are able to travel overseas because with cases still less than 2 000, few of us will have any immunity. Only time will tell whether it was a wise strategy or not.

Despite some feeling relief when the announcement was made that as a nation we would move from Level 4 to Level 3 - it has proved to be essentially Level 4 for those who are not in the subgroup of workers who can return to work safely and maintain social distancing, or, who, like myself, are in the education sector. Stores can now sell goods online and fast food can be purchased by drive-through or delivery options. Mostly, children are still being schooled from home unless their parents have returned to work, and many businesses are still closed nation-wide with employers casting ever increasingly worried eyes at the economy. Elective surgery is still cancelled, doctors first interview patients via telephone before seeing them in person, couriers drop packages a safe distance from the front door, and people wear masks and slather on hand sanitiser the way we used to pour on the sunscreen lotion. We have drive-through medical clinics; we cannot shop in person for items from carpet to furniture to plants to paint to cars to household appliances to buttons to fabric to jewellery to clothes to whatever else you might fancy; and we have essentially become a population that avoids social interaction outside our own four walls.

Unless we have a real need, we stay at home.

But as with everything, there is another side. There are those who have had enough of being confined who are deliberately breaking the rules and potentially putting others at risk. There are businesses and employers who are creatively interpreting the rules and ignoring their responsibilities to employees and customers alike.

On my part, moving to Level 3 was when things really started to get ugly.

Son#2, writing for our church's Facebook page, penned these words which mirrored what I had already observed in my own life:

What lockdown has revealed is how much of a sinner I am and how I can't do anything in my own strength.

What lockdown has revealed …

What lockdown has revealed to me is … that my excuses for lack of time for really reading and studying the Word and praying are just that - excuses.

What lockdown has revealed to me is … that I fill my time with other things to ignore the still small voice within.

What lockdown has revealed to me is … that I use human relationships to fill the desire in my soul for deep and intimate knowing of the One true God.

What lockdown has revealed to me is … that I am selfish … self-centered …. impatient …. resentful … judgemental … jealous ...

What lockdown has revealed to me is … that I am a sinner.

And that's just the start of it. The rest is too ugly to share.

Level 3 has been difficult for me. I am one of only four teachers back at work. I'm working more hours at home and at centre than usual and when I look at those who are not yet working, I feel … resentful. The procedures we have to go through to keep our workplace and homes safe create more work and anxiety. I'm frustrated. Angry even.

And since there are only two in our bubble, I wouldn't be at all surprised if there have been many days when DH has wondered why on earth he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me in the first place!

This morning our pastor reminded us that when we face trials what is deep inside us is what will come out.

Ouch.

Despite having it fairly easy during this crisis compared to others (and I love what I read the other day about how we are all in the same storm but we are not all in the same boat - and my boat has been far more watertight and seaworthy than some), what has surfaced has been not exactly pretty.

Thankfully, our God does not leave us in our sin. He sent His Son to redeem all mankind. Jesus paid the price for our sins.

And, as if that wasn't enough, He began a good work in us to change us into His likeness.

As I was struggling with my thoughts and emotions earlier in the week, God reminded me that what I saw as inequity was an opportunity for me to serve Him. Instead of being resentful because my workload had significantly increased, I could ask Him how I could be of service for Him in the avenues that had now opened. Perhaps He had a work for me to do if only I was willing and available.

Ouch!  (Again.)

While writing this post, DH reminded me that there are now signs that autumn has finally arrived downunder. As leaves change colour and fall from the trees and die, and plants prepare for dormancy over winter, it can sometimes be difficult to remember that this, too, is part of the plan, and that, here, too, wondrous things are happening that may not be evident until a later season.

The same can be true for us. There is an ugly side - I certainly have been made aware of my own ugly side during this lockdown period - but there is also a God who has made me a new creation through His Son and is slowly but surely moulding me into the woman of God that He has planned for me to be since before the world began.

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who according to His abundant mercy has begotten us again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead (1 Peter 1:3, NKJV) … being confident of this very thing, that He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ (Philippians 1:6, NKJV).

The Hills

Our Government's communication to the nation yesterday of what we can expect if we were to return to Level 3 COVID-19 lockdown (which is still an unknown for many of us as we only experienced Level 3 for two days previously when we were already preparing to go into Level 4) has left teachers of all children under fifteen years of age feeling vulnerable ... like the sacrificial lambs to be exact.

While the rest of the nation is being told to still work from home if possible, to maintain social distancing when out, to keep to your "bubbles" (albeit, marginally larger than at Level 4), and that funerals and weddings can now take place with no more than ten persons (and no food), schools and early childhood centres - the latter where social distancing is impossible and close contact unavoidable - are supposedly to reopen.

As of yet, the Government hasn't announced if we are going to Level 3 mid next week when the original four-week lockdown is due to be reviewed, but all signs point in that direction. Numbers of cases are decreasing despite more testing, there have been no deaths for a few days (to date, the death tally stands at nine), and the economy has been sorely bruised.

Businesses need to reopen. Money needs to exchange hands. More than just essential services need to be operating so that employers can pay employees. As lovely as it is working from home, it's not viable for a lot of sectors. But to work, parents need someone to care for their children.

Which has left teachers feeling confused and anxious and even angry (given some of the reactions I have seen online). Some of the suggestions seem far more idealistic than possible. How we can stagger drop-off times when all parents need to start work at the same time, or keep to small bubbles within our work areas when an outdoor area is shared by up to sixty children, or practice personal hygiene when our littlies cough in our faces and cannot wash their hands without assistance, has not been worked out.

All this to say that the latest news was not welcomed by a number of teachers (as much as we miss the children we work with), myself included.

And then I opened my Bible this morning and read Psalm 121. At the beginning of COVID-19 I had seen an article online that said it was one of the most searched for passages during this unsettling period of time. True or not, for me it was simply the next passage in my self-appointed Bible reading programme for 2020.

A Song of Ascents.

I will lift up my eyes to the hills -
From whence comes my help?
My help comes from the Lord,
Who made heaven and earth.

[It's not from the hills - or nature - or tools or policies or even Governments but from the Lord our God, the One who made the heavens and the earth and everything in them in six days. He is certainly not daunted by anything and everything that is happening at present.]

He will not allow your foot to be moved;
He who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, He who keeps Israel
Shall neither slumber nor sleep.

[God is not overwhelmed or too busy with what's happening in the rest of the world to forget what's happening here. He does not need to sleep or take a break. He is continually watching over us.]

The Lord is your keeper;
The Lord is your shade at your right hand.
The sun shall not strike you by day,
Nor the moon by night.

[The Lord is our Keeper, our Provider, our Shield and Protector. We do not need to fear.]

The Lord shall preserve you from all evil;
He shall preserve your soul.

[He is the Risen Saviour, the Resurrected Christ, and He will preserve our souls. We do not need to fear death for He has promised us an eternal home with Him.]

The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in
From this time forth, and even forevermore.

[Even in my day to day life, in my going out and coming in, He is with me. No matter what happens - even if our work places feel unsafe due to things outside our control - He has promised to be with us - today and always. If the Lord is for us - and He is - what need we to fear?]

The Battle

As Easter rapidly approaches, believers everywhere are aware that it's going to look very different this year. Like many other churches, our plans for Easter services this year have either gone out the window or are very much changed.

At present we are in lockdown; two thousand years ago, Jesus' disciples also experienced a type of [voluntary] lockdown.

When the same day at evening, being the first day of the week, when the doors were shut where the disciples were assembled for fear of the Jews, came Jesus and stood in the midst, and saith unto them, Peace be unto you (John 20:19, KJV).

Yesterday as I was talking with a friend on the phone, I reminded her of this incident. As Christians preparing to spend Easter in lockdown, we have been presented with a unique opportunity to reflect on, and gain a new perspective, on the crucifixion and resurrection.

Rather than just going through the motions because we've heard the story so many times before, such an exercise can be valuable in that it forces us to look at this period in history from fresh eyes: to feel something of what the disciples experienced back then - their fear, their anguish, their grief. Because we know the "after", we sometimes don't allow ourselves to think too deeply and to grieve. Grieve for what they did to our Lord. Grieve for what He endured. Grieve because it was my sin that nailed Him to that cross.

There is another benefit to celebrating Easter in lockdown. No longer are we complacent or reliant on our own strength. We look around at what is happening in the world and we can feel overwhelmed. It seems that our world is spiraling out of control, we see fear governing emotions and actions, and it can be so difficult to come to terms with all of the upheaval.

This is where it is so important to consider the whole story of Easter and to remember exactly what happened two thousand years ago in the physical and the spiritual realms.

Jesus broke the chains of sin and death and hell and darkness and nothing that is happening nowadays has changed that. Satan has not reclaimed the victory - quite the contrary - despite what may at first appear to be the case.

Jesus fought the battle and won. The victory is His. Nothing can change that. Not world events, not a lockdown, not fears of a recession, and definitely not COVID-19.

As we celebrate this Easter in our isolation bubbles, we can remember that like the disciples two thousand years ago, we may be feeling fearful, but we need not be afraid, for Jesus, who was crucified, rose again, and the battle is His. This Easter we can celebrate for He has conquered sin and death. He has won.

Hallelujah!

Life and Death

The third Sunday in a row doing church online … I woke disheartened and almost dreading doing church at home.

I'm an introvert - I don't mind being at home. But after seeing no one but DH for almost three weeks, I don't mind admitting that I've had enough. Suddenly, today, not being able to meet with other believers, singing (I love to sing!) and praying together, just seemed wrong.

And it is wrong. What is happening around the world is wrong.

I'm not talking about the measures various governments have put in place. I am grateful for those measures that hopefully will protect many and mean that less lives will be lost and fewer families will grieve loved ones.

No, that's not the problem.

Nor am I talking about the suspected origins of the virus or the time it took to get the message out.

No, what is wrong, is the problem that goes back to the Garden of Eden. One that it's not popular to mention, let alone talk about.

Sin.

Equally as unpopular as talking about sin, is talking about the Serpent of Old, the Father of Lies, our Adversary. Sickness and death are a natural consequence of sin that entered the world through the disobedience of the first couple. With one bite of the apple, they exchanged light and truth for lies and darkness. No longer able to commune intimately with their God and their Maker, they became natural heirs to the kingdom of darkness and all its curses.

And so it would have stood except two thousand years ago Jesus, who was fully human AND fully God, came to earth and paid the price for our sins. Mine. Yours. All who believe and put their trust in Him.

As terrible as the COVID-19 pandemic is, it is simply evidence of a much bigger problem: that of the sin and darkness that entered the world a long time ago and which can only be taken away by the One who is the Resurrection and the Life, the One who has power over life and death, the One who is Sovereign, King of Kings, Lord of Lords, the Alpha and Omega, the Son of God who said, "The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy. I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly." (John 10:10, NKJV).

The Lord reigns;
Let the earth rejoice;
Let the multitude of isles be glad!

Clouds and darkness surround Him;
Righteousness and justice are the foundation of His throne.
A fire goes before Him,
And burns up His enemies round about.
His lightnings light the world;
The earth sees and trembles.
The mountains melt like wax at the presence of the Lord,
At the presence of the Lord of the whole earth.
The heavens declare His righteousness,
And all the peoples see His glory.

Let all be put to shame who serve carved images,
Who boast of idols.
Worship Him, all you gods.
Zion hears and is glad,
And the daughters of Judah rejoice
Because of Your judgments, O Lord.
For You, Lord, are most high above all the earth;
You are exalted far above all gods.

You who love the Lord, hate evil!
He preserves the souls of His saints;
He delivers them out of the hand of the wicked.
Light is sown for the righteous,
And gladness for the upright in heart.
Rejoice in the Lord, you righteous,
And give thanks at the remembrance of His holy name.

Psalm 97, NKJV

A Mighty Fortress

Until recently, the Black Death, Bubonic Plague, Spanish Influenza and other epidemics lived only in the pages of history books.

Not any more.

The twenty-first century may be enlightened with incredible advances in medicine and technology, but the COVID-19 pandemic that is sweeping around the world leaving a trail of dead in its wake, is real.

For many, fear has become a constant companion that we try to ignore with social memes and trust in quackery (the latest I've seen is that we should drink tea to combat the effects of the disease).

During the bubonic plague in Germany, Martin Luther wrote: "I shall ask God mercifully to protect us. Then I shall fumigate, help purify the air, administer medicine and take it. I shall avoid places and persons where my presence is not needed in order not to become contaminated and this perchance inflict and pollute others and so cause their death as a result of my negligence. If God should wish to take me, he will surely find me and I have done what he has expected of me and so I am not responsible for either my own death or the death of others. If my neighbour needs me however I shall not avoid place or person but will go freely as stated above. See this is such a God-fearing faith because it is neither brash nor foolhardy and does not tempt God."

Martin Luther also wrote the words to a song that I have listened to several times over the past week. It is one of his best known hymns and still sung around the world today.

The words have particular meaning at this time in world events:

The song is purported to have been based on Psalm 46 but there is another Psalm that fits the theme really well and which continues to speak to us today ...

He who dwells in the secret place of the Most High
Shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the Lord, "He is my refuge and my fortress;
My God, in Him I will trust."

Surely He shall deliver you from the snare of the fowler
And from the perilous pestilence.
He shall cover you with His feathers,
And under His wings you shall take refuge;
His truth shall be your shield and buckler.
You shall not be afraid of the terror by night,
Nor of the arrow that flies by day,
Nor of the pestilence that walks in darkness,
Nor of the destruction that lays waste at noonday.

A thousand may fall at your side,
And ten thousand at your right hand;
But it shall not come near you.
Only with your eyes shall you look,
And see the reward of the wicked.

Because you have made the Lord, who is my refuge,
Even the Most High, your dwelling place,
No evil shall befall you,
Nor shall any plague come near your dwelling;
For He shall give His angels charge over you,
To keep you in all your ways.
In their hands they shall bear you up,
Lest you dash your foot against a stone.
You shall tread upon the lion and the cobra,
The young lion and the serpent you shall trample underfoot.

"Because he has set his love upon Me, therefore I will deliver him;
I will set him on high, because he has known My name.
He shall call upon Me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble;
I will deliver him and honour him.
will long life I will satisfy him,
And show him My salvation."

Psalm 91, NKJV.

A Month Ago

In the past month, our world has changed drastically.

A month ago we could celebrate birthdays, visit a new mum in hospital, attend a wedding, have coffee with a friend.

A month ago we could go to the doctor, have a hair cut, catch public transport, walk into a store "just to look".

A month ago we could buy flour and baking soda (although, apparently, not toilet paper or hand sanitiser).

A month ago we were still as innocent as young children. We laughed and played and had no idea what was around the corner.

A month ago we could meet with other believers at church, go to work each day, go for a drive for no other reason than to enjoy the scenery, go hunting or tramping, or go to the gym.

A month ago we could chat over the fence to our neighbour, walk around the block, drive to the beach or the lake or the park, or pop into town and talk to acquaintances on the street or in shops and cafes.

A month ago.

A month ago the headlines were still hopeful, people made plans for the future, we learnt how to hand wash properly, and we thought we were safe.

A month ago we could hug our children and cuddle our grandchildren. We thought nothing of smothering sweet baby faces with kisses or breathing words of love in close proximity. A month ago we enjoyed the wet slobbery kisses of children and held them close without fear.

A month ago.

Today it's a different story. Today there is no flour or baking soda in the shops, we can't move outside our bubble, and the news scares us with updates of COVID-19 cases and deaths and debates about establishing a one world goverment to control this menace.

A month ago we could buy thread and fabric, potting mix and firewood, paint and furniture. We could shop online or in person. We could send and receive parcels.

A month ago I could post photos overseas, or, better still, plan a trip overseas.

A month ago.

As I've been writing this I've been reminded of a song we sang as teens: I wish we'd all been ready. One line particularly stands out: A piece of bread could buy a bag of gold.

I suspect we weren't ready for this. Not a month ago. Not now. Will we then be ready when it really counts?

Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations.
Before the mountains were brought forth,
Or ever You had formed the earth and the world,
Even from everlasting to everlasting, You are God.

You turn man to destruction,
And say, "Return, O children of men."
For a thousand years in Your sight
Are like yesterday when it is past,
And like a watch in the night.
You carry them away like  a flood;
They are like a sleep.
In the morning they are like grass which grow up:
In the evening it is cut down and withers.

For we have been consumed by Your anger,
And by Your wrath we are terrified.
You have set our iniquities before You,
Our secret sins in the light of Your countenance.
For all our days have passed away in Your wrath;
We finish our years like a sigh.
The days of our lives are seventy years;
And if by reason of strength they are eighty years,
Yet their boast is only labour and sorrow;
For it is soon cut off, and we fly away.
Who knows the power of Your anger?
For as the fear of You, so is Your wrath.
So teach us to number our days,
That we may gain a heart of wisdom.

Return, O Lord!
How long?

And have compassion on Your servants.

Oh, satisfy us early with Your mercy,

That we may rejoice and be glad all our days!

Make us glad according to the days in which You have afflicted us,
The years in which we have seen evil.
Let your work appear to Your servants,
And Your glory to their children.
And let the beauty of the Lord our God be upon us,
And establish the work of our hands for us;
Yes, establish the work of our hands.

Psalms 90, NKJV

Church Without The Building

Today was our first Sunday in total lockdown but our second Sunday for meeting together without a building. Just consider that for a moment: Church is happening - worldwide, I imagine - without a physical building. What we've always known - i.e. Church is the people and not the building - we are experiencing as reality.

Although we are not able to come together in a physical place, we are able to meet together online. As our sermon livestreamed, I was encouraged to read the comments of others listening in also (even if just a "Good morning" or "Smith family joining in today" or "Amen" from an individual or family whose username I did not recognise) and knowing that we were together as one even if we couldn't see beyond the walls of our individual homes.

This week - due to failing to check the time of the livestream - DH and I did our time together a little differently. We started with the sermon, followed by the suggested playlist of songs, and then followed by communion. Afterwards, we played some of the songs again.

If we needed a reminder that God is in control and that none of this has taken Him by surprise, this week's - and last week's sermon - were timely reminders. Our sermon series are planned in advance - sometimes up to a year in advance. This series has been so appropriate and applicable to this particular season.

We have been looking at Jesus in His own words. Last week the message was "I am the Way, the Truth and the Life." With so much misinformation, with fears around COVID-19, it was certainly an appropriate sermon. Today's message was "I am the Resurrection and the Life". Leading up to Easter, perhaps not a surprising choice (although as I said, this series was chosen months ago) but what perhaps was surprising was what our pastor brought out in his sermon.

He read from John 11:1-16 where Jesus raised Lazarus from the dead. A well-known story and we all know the ending, but when Mary and Martha had seen their brother dead and laid in the grave, with Jesus, to whom they had sent a message, nowhere in sight, what were their feelings? The depth of their anguish - knowing He could have helped but hadn't come? And yet, as they were to learn later, His ways are not our ways. It wasn't until Lazarus was dead - when there could be no argument about him being well and truly dead - that Jesus came to them. And why had He delayed? So that by raising Lazarus from the dead - by releasing them from their suffering - God would be glorified.

In this time of worldwide suffering and the accompanying fear, when God seems to delay and our prayers appear to go unanswered, how can we view this as an opportunity to glorify God?

What can I do?

I love to write. I've seen a call to writers to use this time to bring hope to others. But recently, words have been lacking. On social media I've been sharing the words of others - words that are more profound than anything I could ever write. When I do write, it tends to be heavy and clumsy. I'm not even sure if there is a call on my life to write right now. And yet, I believe, have always believed, that God has given me this gift, so even in this time, when the words are lacking, I feel that I should be doing something.

One thing that I have been doing is sharing prayers that arrive in my inbox each day from YouVersion. Today, I felt that I needed to add something to the particular post rather than simply sharing the prayer, and immediately this verse came to mind ...

Call to Me, and I will answer you, and show you great and mighty things, which you do not know. (Jeremiah 33:3, NKJV).

Having posted the verse with the accompanying prayer, I turned to my Bible. Rather than turn to Psalms or Proverbs as I would on the weekend, I decided to read all of Jeremiah Chapter 33.

The end of the last verse struck me and after reading it several times, I added it (rather awkwardly as a comment) to my previous social media post ...

… for I will cause their captivity to be reversed and will have mercy on them. (Jeremiah 33:26b, WMBEE).

Together these two verses from Jeremiah are powerful in their promise and hope and as we continue in this isolation - for however long - may we be able to bring glory to the Father of all who knows the beginning and the end and Who will never leave us nor forsake us.

Call to me, and I will answer you, and show you great and might things, which you do not know … for I will cause [your] captivity to be reversed and will have mercy on [you].

Even so, Lord Jesus, come.

Coincidence Or Not

Whenever we stay away from home I'm usually pretty good at checking and double-checking rooms for any items left behind but somehow, following Son#4's wedding, I left the charger for my tablet behind. For almost two weeks I had to use my DH's Bible in the morning (because it had larger print than mine - and I still struggled). Finally, last Thursday, I had my charger back.

This morning, I opened my Bible app and was surprised to see that a verse was highlighted in the chapter I was about to read. I asked DH if his was also highlighted on his device because it seemed odd to me that that particular verse was highlighted as I rarely use that function, preferring instead to write down in my prayer journal a verse that speaks to me. DH said his wasn't highlighted and also thought it strange that I couldn't remember having highlighted that particular verse in the past.

The verse had such meaning for me that I immediately copied it down in my prayer journal. I then proceeded to read that chapter - and the next - and then because I read from three separate parts of the Bible over the course of the week, I went to make a note on the document that keeps record of what chapters I've read.

It was then that I discovered I had accidentally read from Exodus instead of Leviticus.

Coincidence that the verse was highlighted? Maybe. Coincidence that I then read from the wrong book of the Bible? Again, maybe. But I like to think that it was something more than that.

And the verse?

'Moses said to the people, "Don't be afraid, for God has come to test you, and that his fear may be before you, that you won't sin."' Exodus 20:20

When Two Or Three

With New Zealand now having declared a COVID-19 Level 2 Alert, church is looking different around the country today.

For DH and I it began with listening to a playlist posted by our church, followed by communion with just the two of us, and then watching a livestream of the sermon from church. Seeing our pastors, and reading the comments by other congregants, helped to feel connected, and the sermon was certainly encouraging and challenging.

This may become the new normal for a while to come.

The future is so uncertain and with that comes anxiety. Our pastor reminded us this morning of Jesus' words in John 14 where He says, "Do not be afraid." A timely reminder - at least for me.

It has been too easy to feel anxious and afraid, especially with the information and opinions online. I worry for my children (and that includes my daughters-in-law) and for my grandchildren. I worry for those who work day to day with sick patients - and for their spouses who live with them. I worry that some may not be taking this as seriously as they ought: that they will disregard the recommendations around physical distancing and handwashing and sanitizer (if they're lucky enough to have any) and everything else. I worry for my parents and mother-in-law who are vulnerable and are now on self-isolation. For them, that also means social isolation as they have no social media, no internet, and only a phone to stay in contact with the outside world. And I worry for myself as my workplace will not be shut down until we reach a Level 4 Alert (despite many other businesses moving to have their employees work from home from this coming week).

But worrying doesn't help. By worrying, our focus and energy is taken up with something that is totally out of our control. Worrying forgets Who is at the helm. Worrying makes us believe the lie that our actions and our government's actions can save us. They can't.

Only Jesus can do that. And only Jesus is our safe refugee in this time of trouble.

These are two songs on our church's playlist today. I hope you find them as encouraging as I did.

For where two or three are gathered together in my name, there am I in the midst of them. (Matthew 18:20, KJV).

Nightmare

It seems that the world has gone crazy. The reality we once knew has disappeared beneath the flood that is COVID-19. At times it's difficult to sift out the media sensationalism from the truth. New reports fill our social media feeds multiple times a day.

Conflicting news reports breeding fear, anxiety, apathy. New measures being introduced almost daily. Statistics that each represent a loved one.

It's overwhelming. It can feel like a nightmare. And it can be scary.

I have loved ones, young and old. And family members who will be exposed to the virus in the course of their work. Others are being encouraged to work from home.

And as a mother I want to bring all my chicks home. Not that I can protect them but at least I would know how they're doing.

As for me, I now have a colleague in self-isolation and another who will be when she returns to the country at the end of the week (if she can return). Sorting relievers for the regulatory fourteen days is going to be difficult.

All our leave has been cancelled. Which means that DH may have to attend a Hospital appointment alone next week. As his wife, I want to be there but it just may not be possible.

Son#5's girlfriend returned to the US last weekend to a whole world that had changed. College closed and only limited time to pack up belongings and books and move home.

A student I'm working with is trying to plan a daughter's wedding amidst all this uncertainty. Selfishly, I'm glad our family wedding is behind us and we didn't have to try and second-guess whether to go ahead or not, whether to recommend to overseas guests that they stay home since some of them would be required to spend fourteen days in isolation here once they arrived and then the same when they returned home, whether to cancel venues and perhaps lose out financially. I know for her it's a headache and there is no easy answer.

We're told to hand wash and social distance ourselves but I can't practice social distance in my job. Infants and toddlers need cuddles and to be held close and they tend to wipe their noses on your clothes and cough all over you. It can't be helped. It's just part of what we do. And while they might spend twenty seconds or more at the bathroom sink, most of that time is spent pushing the soap dispenser and watching the suds appear and pulling out multiple sheets of paper hand towel which they then try to stuff in the drain. They don't get the concept of a thorough hand washing and are not particularly cooperative when we try to insist on more stringent measures.

All of which is to say, while I'm not in one of the more vulnerable groups, I am at risk of picking up the virus and transmitting it to others.

And while we're talking about those who are more vulnerable, let us who are healthy please remember that those vulnerable are your elderly parents, or your music teacher with a compromised immune system, or your friend from church who has had a kidney transplant and is on immuno-suppressive drugs, or your friend's niece who has a rare disease, or the neighbour who is undergoing treatment for cancer, or your colleague's husband who has a heart condition, or your best friend who has diabetes, or someone else you know and dearly love.

Flattening the curve - which appears to be the primary strategy for dealing with the virus in New Zealand and some other countries - is about social responsibility. We all need to do our part - and I'm not sure that's something we all understand.

Not yet anyway.

None of us know how this will play out. I've seen some say it will last for months, others that it will return annually, others that it will burn itself out in a matter of weeks.

Meanwhile, we take what steps we can and learn to live in this new normalcy.

And all the time, we remember that none of this has taken God by surprise. We may not understand what is happening or why but we know that He is still God and He will see us through.

We won't fear the battle, we won't fear the night
We will walk the valley with You by our side
You will go before us, You will lead the way
We have found a refuge, only You can save

Sing with joy now: our God is for us
The Father's love is a strong and mighty fortress
Raise your voice now, no love is greater
Who can stand against us if our God is for us
Even when I stumble, even when I fall
Even when I turn back, still Your love is sure
You will not abandon, You will not forsake
You will cheer me onward with never-ending grace

Sing with joy now: our God is for us
The Father's love is a strong and mighty fortress
Raise your voice now, no love is greater
Who can stand against us if our God is for us

Neither height nor depth can separate us
Hell and death will not defeat us
He who gave His son to free us
Holds me in His love
Neither height nor depth can separate us
Hell and death will not defeat us
He who gave His son to free us
Holds me in His love

Sing with joy now: our God is for us
The Father's love is a strong and mighty fortress
Raise your voice now, no love is greater
Who can stand against us if our God is for us

Sing with joy now: our God is for us
The Father's love is a strong and mighty fortress
Raise your voice now, no love is greater
Who can stand against us if our God is for us