This past fortnight I had reason to order another fifty copies of my first book from the publisher. At the time, I still had one left. It's now gone.
I remember when I purchased the first one hundred: I was afraid I was going to have them left on my hands for ever. Since then, I've had to place several orders, yet each time I wonder if I'll be able to sell them all.
After my second book launch, my second granddaughter, then aged about three or so, asked me one day, "Do you remember when you had all those books you were trying to get rid of?" I explained that I'd written the books and that on that particular day I was signing them for people who wanted to buy them. She was unimpressed, as are all my granddaughters when I mention that I've written books.
It's very humbling.
Several months ago I finished another book but rather than get straight into editing - which is what I've done in the past - I put it aside and begun another book. In all honesty, I don't know what I'll do with the manuscript once it's edited. Perhaps that's why I didn't jump straight into editing this time.
Do I really want to publish again? All that editing and proof reading and deciding on a cover. And then there's the marketing and accounts. If I could just write and let someone else handle the other ... I think that's the dream of every modern day writer who struggles to get their work recognised.
But if I don't publish, why do I write?
The answer is simple: I write because I can't help myself. There is satisfaction in the act of writing. Through my writing I seek to serve God and others. Writing is an act of worship ... with my writing I seek to glorify the One that created me and Who deserves all praise and glory.
So even if not another single manuscript sees the light of day, I'll still keep writing.
It's what I was created to do.